Dateline Late Friday, March 18, 2005

Friday night. Drunk. High. Dogs been out. I been fed. Syracuse playing on the big screen. Mark McGwire sitting home lamenting his no more hero status. Mark McGwire is forever cursed, like Shoeless Joe Jackson, and he’ll probably never be elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame. Already his hometeam town of St. Louis is trying to unname their I-70 from Mark McGwire to I-70. St. Louis is looking for anonymity now, after being unavoidably associated with perhaps the greatest liar in the history of the game.

My sons’ NCAA bracket is not in last place in the office pool. The only real upset so far was a 12 over a 5, so things are normal and good. But it’s only the second night, and anything will happen, still.

My only complaint is that the television station here is showing the Duke-Delaware State game. They cut away after the first four minutes of the Syracuse-Vermont game to show this shit. Granted, we’re a couple hours from Delaware, and Duke is a favorite opponent of Baltimore, an hour’s drive from here. But Pittsburgh, Villanova and Georgetown of the Big East are all within a similar radius, and the Orange’s Gerry McNamars is from nearby Scranton. Above all, Syracuse is a 4-13 and Duke is 1 seed. So I’m watching this illogical crap, and Duke is already up 10-3. And I get from the game I want to watch is the tiny type scoreboard in the upper reaches of the tv screen.

Of the five players other than Jose Canseco who appeared before Congress on Thursday, McGwire was the only one who left the public with the clear, new knowledge that he took steroids. Palmeiro and Sosa categorically denied it, under oath, as did Frank Thomas, who phoned it in. Curt Schilling didn’t need to deny anything. He was only there because years ago he had declared steroid use in baseball to be a rampant problem. While Schilling did back off of that hardline stance at the hearings, saying he had exaggerated the problem, McGwire’s position of no comment simply another way of admitting the truth. The truth is that McGwire used steroids, knowingly and consistently.

Perhaps Sosa is lying. Maybe we’ll never know. But his statements were clear and firm: that he never did. If you’re going to lie, you might as well do it. I cant respect someone who cant even commit to his own inventions. McGwire didn’t have the balls to lie and didn’t have the balls to admit he did it. He’s shrunk, literally and figuratively.

Not that Mark won’t be fine in the future court of public opinion. Even Ollie North has a radio show. And McGwire’s not a gambler, exactly. America doesn’t like gamblers, ask Shoeless Joe and Charlie Hustle. Drug addicts we can handle, and that’s the best way for Mark to get around the situation, even if his bust will never have a place in Cooperstown. In fact, his best option is probably to not only blame his lying on his dependence on some arbitrary habit, like Vicodin or Xanax, but on the steroids! Pull out all the stops, buddy. Quickest way to redemption is by displaying the affects on national television. His cowardice will become bravery, his selfishness mere quiet pride.

Donald Fehr confirmed my previous opinion of him: a fantastically corrupt individual not threatened by the puny brains of all those who should bow to him. Selig acted like a newly hands-on corporate CEO: greedy, and practical to a fault in business, but well-versed in nice-sounding, reassuring rhetoric. I’d never been so wrapped up in a Congressional hearing since it was Ollie North as the villian. Him, I could accept. It’s been assumed for years the politics, and the military, are preternaturally corrupt and manipulative. But it’s new that sports - baseball - can muster such an image. They may have waited, but they did it right. Before you know it, baseball will be about as relevent as professional wrestling and boxing.

If there were to be an unexpected delight right now, it would be for Duke to lose in the first round to Delaware State. They’re down 13-12, having surrendered an 11-1 run since we last visited them. Seeing Duke lose to a 16 seed would justify my watching them, for once.

I’ve been doing a lot of smoking lately, and more drinking than usual. I wonder if this is bad. It probably is. It certainly is. In order to make this work, I’m going to have to do more writing as I go.

It doesn’t look good for Duke, who’s got 2 players already in foul trouble. They’re trying to play tough and it’s not working, and that’s not good for the big favorites. They’re losing their cool. And they’re on the road, in Charlotte - Tobacco Road country as far as the crowd in concerned. Chances are, they’re hang on and outlast the untested underdog, but the tireder Duke gets, the less chance they’ll make it past Syracuse, or even to Syracuse. I have to cling to something, and with 7 minutes left in the first halves of the first round of the NCAAs, there’s lots of things to cling to, so I might as well go for broke.

And two hours later, nothing rips your heart out like your team losing in the first round to Vermont. Syracuse did what they do best – they beat themselves. It was painful to watch. I knew they’d go out too early, but I didn’t figure it would be like this.

- posted by seanmh @ 9:43 AM