It's Presidents' Day (Washington's and Lincoln's both — they're oldtimers so we just combined them for irrelevence's sake) and I'm the only person in my cubicle group here at work. The Strokes is playing loudly. I've got a full bottle of water, a good day's worth of work on my desk, a bitingly painful back, and snazzy sideburns. For some reason I'm feeling creative today; maybe something will come of this.

This is something that somebody wrote in response to a recent poem of mine: "I see you wrapping your arms around the Earth. Right now, I see this in my mind, which is where I read the writings you offer. Show me the line that separates them."

Despite the lack of clarity in that comment, I was vaguely pleased with it, thinking it to be at least an attempt at a compliment. But the last sentence threw me. The "show me" thing is something that would come from a teacher, and it therefore sounds presumptuous to me, which I don't like, especially from someone I don't know. But reading that sentence made me feel like I must have been missing something in the first part of the comment. So I went back to examine it.

"I see you wrapping your arms around the Earth." That comes from some of the imagery i invoked in my poem, which talks about my childhood challenging of the "nothing is impossible" mantra. Okay, that's a nice thought.

"Right now, I see this in my mind, which is where I read the writings you offer." So this person sees that image in his mind. Well, great! That's the best thing a writer can hear. But then he says that his mind is where he reads the writings I offer. Aside from "writings you offer" being slightly condescending (along with the "show me" comment), I'm not sure what I think about his meaning when he says that his mind is where he reads my writings. I mean, sure. Well, I guess, but I'm not sure how this statement is meant to distinguish my writings from anything else this person experiences.

"Show me the line that separates them." This is completely nonsensical. Show him the line that separates what? The line that separates his mind from my writings? The line that separates the world from my writing or the world from his mind or, what?

It's possible that this person is inarticulate but thoughtful, in that he is getting ahead of his thoughts when his pen hits the page, in much the same way that someone will start laughing about something because his mind has made up a joke that only he understands, and when he tries to explain, he skips over the transition between what was said (what everyone heard) and what he turned it into. But I don't think that's the case. I think, instead, what we have here is the failure of a wanna-be poet to express himself in language that he thinks is artful and meaningful simply because it sounds pretty and vague.

I think what we have here is a poser.

Anyway, here is the poem that was responded to. It also drew another response that I didn't understand. Maybe it's me, but I doubt it. I call this one, "Mean Poem." I think you'll find it to be prescient.

it's possible
that you know what you're doing
but i'm not going to
bet the farm on it

as a little boy
i used to hear all the time:
"anything is possible!
you can fly to the moon
you can be the president
you can get her to like you
you can get an A."
and i would say,
"can i wrap my arms
around that building over there?
can i stand on one toe and
spin like a top?
can i jump between planets
with a shoelace in my teeth?"
and
the answer was always "no,
of course
not."
well then,
stop fucking with me.

i wouldnt make that bet
with somebody else's farm
i dont even have a farm
i dont even like to bet

and dont insult
my imagination
by telling me that
anything is possible -
because it's not,
seeing as you're still here.

- posted by seanmh @ 11:14 AM